Oh, Those Titles!

Titles are important. They set the tone of the book.  I’m working on an adult series, a Western Romantic Suspense, and I’m proud of my title:  Secrets of Sweet Mesquite.  

But when I started thinking about titles, I couldn’t help but to think about song titles. Being quarantined I had some time on my hands, so I googled a few. And let’s just say I spent about an hour with tears in my eyes.  There are some songs with titles that brought some powerful emotions out of me.

For starters, Johnny Cash sang  a real heart tugger, “Flushed From the Bathroom of Your Heart.” All I can say is, hmmm. Roger Miller sang one with a title that kind of baffled me, “You Can’t Rollerskate in a Buffalo Herd.” 

Trace Adkins entertained hundreds with one song titled, “Honky Tonk Badonkadonk.”  And the song has some lyrics worth mentioning, “Got it going on like Donkey Kong. Shut my mouth. Slap your grandma.”  Now I’m betting Grandma didn’t appreciate that.  I think I heard that song, but I still don’t know what it’s about.

But that bit of lyrics had me thinking about a Christmas song, “Grandma Got Ran Over by a Reindeer,” sang by Elmo and Patsy. I love that song.  Sorry Grandma.

Loretta Lynn and Conway Twitty sang one with a title that really spoke the truth,  “You’re the Reason Our Kids Are Ugly.”  David Allan Coe harmonized to one clever melody, “You Never Even Called Me By My Name” and some of the lyrics are worth mentioning: “Well, I was drunk the day my mom got out of prison, and I went to pick her up in the rain. But before I could get to the station in my pickup truck, she got runned over by a darned old train.”  Yeah, wow! That’s a head scratcher.

Now, Frank Zappa sang one with a title that had some good advice in it that I do follow, “Don’t Eat the Yellow Snow.”  The Cramps also had one that offered some counsel I try to abide by, “Don’t Eat the Stuff Off the Sidewalk.”

Aaron Wilburn gave meaning to a real love song that every woman would love to hear, “If My Nose was Running Money, I’d Blow it All on You.”  But Ruby Wright made my heart heavy with one titled, “Billy Broke My Heart at Walgreens And I Cried all the Way to Sears.” I’d love to add some lyrics to it, “But I found someone new and was happy as a daisy before I got to Macys.”  (Maybe I’ll stick to writing books and not songs.)  

Dan Hicks had a song with great title that would make a good quarantine song, “How Can I Miss You If You Won’t Go Away.” Frank Serafino, had a real love ballad titled, “If I’d Shot You When I’d Wanted to, I’d Be Out by Now.” That might be a quarantine song too.

Jimmy Buffett’s song title, “If the Phone Doesn’t Ring, You’ll Know it’s Me,” made me crack a smile.  Bill Anderson sang one with the title, “Walk Out Backwards,” and the lyrics read: “When you leave, walk out backwards, so I’ll think you’re walking in.”  I think she left due to his drinking, don’t you?

How about… “May the Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose” by Little Jimmie Dickens,

Last but not least, Billy Walker sang one titled, “I’m so Miserable Without You, It’s Almost Like Having You Here.”  Do you know any funny song titles or lyrics?  Let’s have a chuckle.

2 thoughts on “Oh, Those Titles!

  1. Snake Farm by Ray Wiley Hubbard . Conversations with the Devil . Screw you , We’re from Texas . Also Ray’songs. Here Come The Mummies has some cute songs to such as Cream Flag , Hard at Work , Reno Shui . Damn Good . Keep in mind that Here Come the Mummies lyrics are for Adults. Joe Bonnamassa has a song called Sick in Love with you . Also very good.

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