Death, Taxes, and a Sequined Clutch

CONTEST! Today, I’m giving away ten copies of Diane Kelly’s new novella Death, Taxes, and a Sequined Clutch to some lucky commenters!

Please help me welcome my friend, Diane Kelly today to Laugh, Love, Read.  She’s a phenomenal writer and a great lady!  You’re gonna love her. . . she’s a hoot!

So let’s get to the questions!

What is the craziest experience you’ve had as an author?

One of my former coworkers is an avid reader, though her taste runs to authors like Fannie Flagg who write stories much less sassy and sexy than my books.  Before I got published, she was one of my best cheerleaders, encouraging me and always asking about my writing. When my first book came out, I was extremely excited and gave her a copy even though I knew it wasn’t the type of book she typically chose for herself.  She came to my office a few days later, closed the door, and gave me a sheepish look. “I didn’t like your book,” she said.

I was taken aback.  I know she meant well and wanted to give me honest feedback, but how do you respond to that?  Half of me wanted to laugh, half wanted to say, “Well, give the d*mn book back then!”

In retrospect now, it makes me chuckle.  No book will please every audience, and this type of honest feedback keeps an author humble.

Name three things you have in common with your heroine.

#1 Bra size. Enough said.

#2 Both Tara Holloway and I majored in accounting at the University of Texas in Austin.  Hook ‘em Horns!

#3 Tara and I like to see justice be done and to do what we can to right wrongs.  But while IRS Special Agent Tara Holloway uses a gun to exact justice, I wrote letters on behalf of clients in my law practice.  Still, the pen can sometimes be as mighty as the sword. Though I wasn’t always able to get justice for my clients, I did my best and was often able to make things better. If I’d carried a Glock like Tara, I probably could’ve accomplished even more. ; )

If you had to be locked in a closet with one person, who would it be?

My gut reaction is to say George Clooney but, truth be told, I’d really rather be covered in chocolate sauce and rolling around on a king-sized bed with him than stuck in a closet!

Ironically, the person I’d most like to be locked in a closet with is someone who came out of the closet years ago – Ellen DeGeneres.  I have so much respect and admiration for her both professionally and personally.  She’s an incredibly talented and funny writer, actress, and talk show host, with a rare sincerity and genuineness about her. I like her message that we should be more accepting and tolerant of each other’s differences.  I’m also a huge animal lover and I like that she promotes animal welfare and rights.  I’d love to pick her brain on humor, her secrets of success, and basically just shoot the breeze with her. It would be a hoot!

LOL, love it!

***

Big laughs at a small price!  Get Diane’s latest release, an electronic exclusive novella entitled Death, Taxes, and a Sequined Clutch, for only $1.99!

IRS special agent Tara Holloway isn’t going to let a perfect opportunity to collect pass her by. Especially when she can do it in sequins and a bedazzled hip holster …

Death and taxes wait for no woman. And if anything can take Tara’s mind off gorgeous temptation Nick Pratt, her new coworker, it’s a case at her old accounting firm—involving none other than the arrogant womanizer who humiliated her years ago. Taking down brothers who’ve lied and cheated their way into millions is a professional satisfaction, but catching Nathan Jamison with his pants down is the most fun Tara can have without Nick. That is, until the bullets start flying…

Read an excerpt here: http://www.dianekelly.com/death-taxes-and-a-sequined-clutch/?action=excerpt

Find Diane Kelly online at www.dianekelly.com, www.facebook.com/dianekellybooks, www.twitter.com/dianekellybooks!

***

Thanks so much for being here, Diane!

Now, I’ve already asked who you’d like to be locked in a closet with.  So, now tell me about your crazy experiences in your job for a chance to win an e-copy of Diane’s novella.  Be sure and check back next week to see if you’re one of my ten lucky winners!  Good luck!

40 thoughts on “Death, Taxes, and a Sequined Clutch

  1. The craziest thing that has happened at my job currently is about a month or so ago I accidentally backed into my bosses SUV with a work truck. I was so upset and the guys I work with were trying to calm me down and I was afraid of being fired (although my bosses boss is my dad so he can only fire me) and disappointing my dad. Well later that evening I had to make a delivery to a job site in my work truck and I had to waste time since the delivery wasn’t for several hours so I went to target. After I got to target I went to the back of the van to make sure it was locked and found a sign on the back saying… How’s my driving call 1-800-who-cares. I started cracking up and turns out my coworker decided to mess with me and it made my day a little better.

  2. One of the craziest things that ever happened to me was back in my very first job. I was the naive one back then only just twenty. I was the releif resenptionist and I worked for a big comsetic firm. One of the suppliers came in nearly everyweek and we was so handsome and I would gush over him. All the other girls in the would just smile and not say much. He would continue to me fantasy until one day he asked me to lunch, I was so shocked and I went with him. We had a lovely lunch and when I came back I was on cloud nine.. But then my bubble was burst, when my boss told me that Hugh, wore are fondation. I had not idea that he was gay.. It was a big let down, but we continued to be friends until I left that job.

  3. Bra size!!! LOL. Funny work story was 15 years ago when a co-worker stormed into my office and said, “I need your panty hose right now!” Of course I complied, but did spend the rest of the day behind my desk!

    • Je dois dire que je ne suis pas forcément d’accord avec tout ce qu’elle développe. Dans le webdocu que je suis en train de finaliser, j’aurais ainsi souhaité m’effacer complètement sans l&stn17;i2si#8ance de mes enseignants. De même, je pense que la vidéo a encore une place à jouer dans les webdocumentaires. Ceci en grande partie à cause / grâce à la multiplicité de styles.

    • Consider yourself lucky! I’ve had so many crazy things happen, including working twice for white-collar criminals. Yikes!

  4. Have read all of the Tax series, including the novella. That was timed pretty good since I’m impatiently waiting for the new release.

    I work in surgery. For all those that wonder what happens during surgery sometimes things can get a little crazy and we enjoy a good laugh. For those of you who will respond that we shouldn’t be laughing during surgery, let me say it’s what keeps us sane. When you have a very stressful day and you can still find anything that will bring a smile it’s worth it.

    Now for the funniest thing that happened that I will write about. We had one surgeon who wore a toupee. As you see on TV we are required to have scrub hats on. One day a nurse came in to give the one assigned to the room a break. While she was in there she knocked over the light source that was attached to the headlight. When it fell it pulled the headlight off along with the scrub hat and the toupee. I couldn’t help it and just busted out laughing. The remainder of the surgery I couldn’t look up because everytime I did I would start giggling again. The surgeon looked at me and said it’s not that funny, my response Oh yes it is.

    • That’s hilarious!!! I have no idea how you were able to continue working! I would’ve been soooo fired!

      My sister is a labor and delivery nurse and has told me a lot of funny stories from her job. One of the funniest was when the doctors had T-shirts made that read ‘Together We’re A Team’. There was one word on each line, with the first letter in a different color. So reading in from top to bottom, it spelled TWAT. It was a total accident, but totally funny!

      It’s interesting how the most stressful situations can also provide lots of humor. You are totally right about needing humor as a coping mechanism in those situations!

      So glad you enjoyed the books! It’s been a blast writing them, too!

  5. We ordered an (Unnamed) internet service. After waiting 19 day cancelled it
    and contacted a local cable service. Had internet service in 5 hours. Yesterday
    after 40 days, I was texted that my service would be up and running after 8 pm
    today. I called the service and advised them that I did not want it anymore as
    I had had internet since 21 days ago From another service and theirs had been cancelled at the time. My biggest laugh was when they thanked me for using
    their service.

    • Ughhhhhh!!!!!! I feel your pain! We had a big problem with an internet service, too, that I won’t name . . . okay, I will. It was Charter. And their service was chitty. : ) We got struck by lighting – not their fault of course – but they kept scheduling appointments for a tech to come fix the problem, then when the appointment time would arrive we’d get an automated phone call saying the appointment had been rescheduled for the next day. And of course since there wasn’t a human being on the line, we couldn’t ask why the heck they weren’t showing up as promised. My husband was coming home from work early for these appointments and it totally screwed him over. Then, when they finally actually sent a repair tech, they’d send an “outside guy” and he’d say the problem was “inside,” and then we’d finally get and “inside guy” to come and he’d say the problem was “outside.” I finally begged an outside tech to look inside and told him what we’d been going through for weeks and he found the problem. When we did talk to Charter, they were trying to sell us more services, like cable TV. It was like, “Seriously? You aren’t even fixing the problem we have now and you’ve been cancelling our repair appointments over and over again and you expect us to give you more money? Are you nuts?” Okay, rant over! Hope your problems are over, too!

      • Have you ever noticed when you call these services to try to cancel or set up an appointment they never answer that line, you have to leave a message. But if you press the number for new service they answer right away. I’ve learned just to press the new service line when I want to talk to someone, but they are not happy when you tell them you are really calling about something else

  6. Before leaving for work I slipped on my shoes in a hurry and then I was out the door. I didn’t look at my feet until arriving at work. I had one blue shoe on…the other was black. Yeah, my co-corker laughed at that one!

    • Funny! My roomate did the same thing in college once. She had the same pair of shoes in brown and black and couldn’t decide which to wear, so she put one of each on to compare, then got distracted and went to class with two different colored shoes. So you are not alone! : )

      • While I’ve never left with different shoes, one night on call I failed to put on a bra, and didn’t notice until I was changing into scrubs. Now you all know how cold operating room are so it was obviously noticeable

        • I really like the textured carawageiry. Unlike uniform asphalt surface, tiles of diffirent colour make the scale of the street more humaine rather than vehicular. Which in its turn will make motorists drive slowly. Very good design hook!

  7. I work for the District Attorney’s Office as an enforcement worker so needless to say we have some CRAZY days but as a way to wind down a lady that sits beside me wanted to sing something and she couldn’t think of anything so she decided to sing a song from the Little Mermaid movie. She didn’t realize that I was looking over the wall at her and started recording her on my phone. I kept up the recording the entire time as the rest of the enforcement staff (my self excluded) started belting out lyrics. To this day they don’t think that it is very funny that I have that recording lol.

  8. Okay, I decided to get brave and tell the funniest thing that happened to me at work. It was years ago. I was twenty-three, working for an Ear, Nose and Throat doctor, who was a very stuffy older man who intimidated the heck out of me. I was an English/Spanish translator. The patient, a young man, had nose surgery and wanted to know when he could resume having oral sex. I was young and so innocent and I just about fainted at the thought of asking the old doc what the young guy had asked.

    I still blush thinking about it.

    CC

  9. The funniest thing that happened to me on the job was about nineteen years ago. I had just started a job at Wal-Mart and it was my first day of work. I’d worn a dress to work so I would look my best. Halfway through my shift I had to run to the back to grab some merchandise that had just been delivered. Arriving in the back I noticed I was alone and so I decided I’d fix my pantyhose that had slipped drastically down my legs before I took the merchandise back out on the floor. So I proceeded to hike my skirt up, pull down my pantyhose (yes I was wearing underwear) and realign my wayward hose. After the adjustment I picked up the merchandise and returned to the job at hand.
    The next morning as I walked into work, heading toward the back to check in for the day, I received several nods, snickers and right outloud laughs from the members of management. Perplexed, I stopped my brother, who was also working there at the time, and asked what was going on. Barely able to contain himself, he replied, “Susie, just so you know for future use, there are cameras in the back and let’s just say…you provided one hell of a good show yesterday!”

    • Bull. There are extremely violent youth fighting videos on youtube that have been up for over a month and have over a million views. Despite what the sheep at the bottom at youtube say, google and youtube care nothing about being a responsible cyber citizen and care only about profits. They want the hits these videos get more than they want to protect citizens. Give us a break google, just tell the truth, youtube is a promoter of violence among the worlds youth because the hits sell ads and google is nothing but a greedy entity.

  10. I was working for a bank called Wachovia ” now Wells Fargo” it was the Friday before the July 4th holiday. The bank was on freedom drive in Charlotte, N.C. And we were robbed at gun point. Very crazy scary stuff.

  11. I am a hair dresser so needless to say I hear crazy stuff all the time… but thwarting craziest thing I have seen in the salon is….

    A male client came in and I knew he had been wanting to ask our receptionist out… And he did…. BOTH OF THEM… HE WANTED THEM FOR A THREE SOME!!! I had NO idea that was coming… mortified and embarrassed he was black listed from our salon…

  12. I’m a librarian, so I do get a lot of funny things happening in the Library. Mostly, it’s students asking for funny things…like photographs of dinosaurs–not drawings, not museum exhibits, not skeletons, photos of real dinosaurs. And recently, we had a student ask for information on “oranges and peaches.” My fellow librarian went into a very in depth reference interview, asking what info was needed about oranges and peaches. Did she need to know about different types of fruit? How to grow it? Was it a culinary class–was she looking for recipes? When the girl said it was for an Anthropology class, the librarian was even more confused. After a lot more questioning, the librarian referred to the course textbook to realize that she wanted information on Charles Darwin’s Origin of Species. Of course, we would never laugh about such a thing, but we did chuckle about it just a tad bit.

  13. I work in a student area at a college so a lot of days are crazy and unexpected. Their could be the issues with drunk non-students in the area but I tend to want to focus on the positive. This semester — 2 young men completely freaking out because they went into the wrong room (they did not notice me at my desk until I was laughing uncontrollably). The one stated “I should have realized it was the wrong room when there was no urinals!” Or the student that sent text messages to the wrong number instead of the girl he was flirting with it was a 25 year old male firefighter! We laughed so hard, the students have tears running down my face. Or there is always the student from India who kneels infront of my desk, singing to me in Hindy what a beautiful goddess I am. Every day is a new adventure. I love my students and my time with them.

  14. I’m not exactly sure how crazy it was. Now that I think about it, I can’t believe out stupid I was. I’m a former accountant as well. I had this client who didn’t like to pay us and after we did everything for him, he said he wasn’t a happy with our work. This of course is after we wouldn’t do anymore work for him.

    We asked him to come and pick up all of his documentation. Well, my lovely bosses (they REALLY are and were GREAT guys) decided to go to the movies around the time the guy was supposed to show up. That left me to deal with the guy. Luckily, the office assistant was still there with me.

    I listed out EVERYTHING I was turning over to guy on a piece of paper and showed everything to him, which was in a box. I asked him to sign the paperwork, so he couldn’t come back and say we kept anything. He refused and thus the loudest argument you have ever heard started. Actually, the arguing was on his part. I was pretty much firm with my you can’t have this unless you sign and say you received everything. The guy starts using all kinds of words, words his four year shouldn’t have heard. Needless to say, the guy left without his stuff.

    An hour later, he was STILL around. In the end, he signed the paperwork….

  15. Great interview thanks. Nothing too crazy has happened to me or from me, but I have often told my co-workers that if/when I do finally quit my job that I’m planning on acting out the scene from half-baked where scarface quits his job, but that’s become a bit of a cliche so now I have to find another way to go out in a blaze of glory, or at least just daydream about it. 🙂

    • I just became your follower. I found you over on seoc8mlon&#i217;s book review link up. I have added this book to my to-read list. Check out my blog some time if you like.

  16. The funniest thing that happened to me on a job was falling face first in the snow as my boss was walking me around the facility. He was showing me where our smoking area was and i slipped on ice and bounced up and down on my tummy every time I tried to get up. I couldn’t help but just lay there laughing. He tried not to and tried to help me but we both just lost it. Here I am a big woman rolling around in the snow trying to get up.

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